Calling something sacred is simply a way to help us see it with new eyes. It invites us out of our day-to-day experience, and into a sense of the power of the thing – the power to change us, to take us deeply into meaning, deeply into our hopes, even deeply into our fears.
When we call sexuality sacred, it reminds us that in the society at large, it is anything but sacred. If sexuality were truly respected as the power that it is, we wouldn’t need to call it anything! Taking a sacred approach to sexuality allows us to give it the attention it deserves. It invites us to re-connect our hearts with our sexual desires, to respect our desires, and to express them in ways that honor ourselves and those with whom we share them.
“Sacred Sexuality” can take many forms. You can’t recognize it by what it looks like from the outside, or even by what activities you may engage in. (that’s right, it’s more than candles) It is a state of mind, a state of heart, and a state of allowing the power of your own sensuality to guide you to a deeper connection with yourself. And a deeper connection with yourself allows you a deeper connection with your loved ones.
The form may be very simple – time on a massage table with skillful and attentive hands that allow you to experience your sensuality in a new way. Or it may be a series of lessons, guiding you into deeper discovery of your energy or emotions. Or it may be a more complex relationship in which your learning is interwoven with your play. It may even be as simple as meeting the eyes of your beloved and seeing the love that is already there.
The irony, of course, is that all of life is sacred, not just the parts we name. By naming it, we are simply reminding ourselves of what is already true.